We had covered the material of the day according to the syllabus and had a few minutes left before the end of class. Rather than dismissing my students early, I decided to open the floor to anyone who wanted to talk…about anything. One of my quieter students had a bunch of things to say. Apparently, someone they’d trained at their part-time job had been promoted over her, and she had – as they say, ‘feels’ about it. Her story struck a nerve with nearly everyone in the room. Many shared instances of being passed over, neglected, made invisible, taken advantage of, ambushed, or just treated badly without obvious reason or provocation. When the last student had their say, I thanked them for being transparent and sharing their feelings, and I reminded them that they were in good company. I told them that there will be many times in life that they will have these experiences.
One student remarked, Saying, “Why bother then? Why bother to do anything right? Why bother to help people, or give my best, when I’m gonna end up being kicked to the curb? Why should I care?
After a second, I remembered something my mother told me as a child when I once made the same comments. She’d told me that I had to learn to pick and choose my battles carefully and that it’s useless to focus on every single slight. She told me that we can’t change the way people think or what they say, and that the only thing we will ever have any control over is ourselves. We get to choose how we’re going to respond to people and things that tend to irk us or invite us to lose our peace.
The moment I finished my comments, I remembered an article I’d read decades ago. I thought this would be the perfect time to share it. I retrieved it from the internet and read it to the class. It’s called the Paradoxical Commandments. Although often attributed to Mother Theresa, it was written by Dr. Kent M. Keith in 1968. The piece has been adopted and edited over the years, even called the “Anyway Prayer”, especially considering the last two lines, later added by an unknown contributor. More than likely, you’ve heard of it or read it before, but like all kinds of wisdom, you can never read it too many times.
The Paradoxical Commandments
by Dr. Kent M. Keith
People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.
The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.
People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
After reading this to them…they asked me to post the link to the article on Blackboard. I promised I would, and dismissed them.
I smiled and realized that the most important learning of the day happened in the last eight minutes.
http://www.prayerfoundation.org/mother_teresa_do_it_anyway.htm